Think you are ready and have what it takes to be the best MOH or Bridesmaid? There is more to being a Bridesmaid than sipping bubbly and planning the parties and showers. It is an honor to be a Bridesmaid, but it's a lot of work. You have been a part of her life and there for her no matter what so her wedding day and the months leading up to it are no exception for you to be there for her every step of the way. Here are just a few ways to be supportive with and for all things Bride:
- Plan ahead. As soon as you said "I DO" to the Bride start connecting with the other Bridesmaids to begin coordinating and working out your schedules and offer dates / weekends that everybody is available and can agree upon to have the Bridal shower, Bachelorette weekend, and any other festivities so those dates can be carved out ahead of time. Of course, check with the Bride first for her ideal dates and work with that.
- Give your honest opinion. You are one of her best friends for a reason and there's no reason to hold back your opinions now. Be respectful in the choices she's making, but give your honest opinion. For example, your styles may differ so just because it's a dress you may not choose doesn't mean it doesn't look good or suit her style and body type so say something like "I love how it fits on you, I couldn't pull that off." Or you can be honest and say "it's showing the girls too much or it's not accentuating enough of your assets" ;)
- Respect the Bride's decisions. This goes hand in hand with #1. If there is something she has requested of you that you disagree with respectfully ask her about it but be open minded of her response and just go with it. You never know if you will or may request a similar task when it's your time ;)
- Be proactive. Schedule some QT with just you and the Bride. Offer to lend and ear for a vent session or just take her away for a bit from all the wedding planning. Even if it's a quick Starbucks date it will mean a lot and she will definitely remember the time you took to reach out just to check in that she's ok.
- It's not about you. When it comes to the wedding day remember whose day it is. If you know you take longer than most to get ready plan ahead of what you need to get done so you can focus and be ready when you are supposed to be. Do everything the night before. Steam and iron your dress and be sure it fits. Try it on with your shoes and be sure you are comfortable. Do not wait until the morning of the wedding to fix the seam or sew a button. Help with the Timeline and be sure that the Bride and all other Bridesmaids are on track and doing what they need to do. It is the Maid of Honor's task, but often she could be busy with all things Bride that day and could use the help of all Bridesmaids to be sure all other tasks are organized and on track.
- Respect the Vendors. The vendors are an extension of the Bride and Groom. They have worked hard behind the scenes to know exactly what the Bride and Groom want and to execute their job they often need the help and cooperation of the wedding party. If you are the MOH introduce yourself to the vendors that will be working closely with the Bride and Groom the whole day, specifically the photographer, videographer, and wedding planner. They will appreciate knowing they have a direct point of contact and that you are there to help in any way to be the liaison to the Bride and wedding party.
- Save money. Committing to being a Bridesmaids does mean that you are willing and able to help plan, participate, and help contribute for any and all events leading up to the wedding day, including purchasing your attire, shoes, jewelry, hair and make-up (if not provided for by the Bride), travel plans, party expenses, gifts, etc...! It can all add up so just for your own sanity start setting funds aside and begin budgeting with the rest of the Bridesmaids fair and reasonable costs and expenses for each category. Be mindful of those that are unable to contribute as much. Try to keep events local. And if the bachelorette party must be a getaway out of town then compromise and keep other events and items to a minimum - think DIY! ;)
It is a great honor to be a Bridesmaid and hopefully with these tips you are ready for the task at hand. Remember that with all the time (well) spent, expenses, and stresses of planning that you are celebrating a milestone in your best friend's life and part of another chapter of your friendship together. Cheers!